Translator: Helliot
Editor: P’Raikantopeni
–
“Aunt Zhang, has Meng Fu been reading the papers?” Gu Ze asked Aunt Zhang after recalling the news he saw on the papers he read in the morning.
“Mr. Meng looked through them yesterday.”
“Very well. You’re excused.”
The fact that Meng Fu had seen the news meant that Meng Fu must have found out about the interview, but he just acted oblivious about it in front of him.
No. There was no need for Meng Fu to put on an act. He was well-aware that Meng Fu always appeared calm and indifferent other than when he was pleading for him to stop or when it hurt in bed.
He was used to burying his own sadness deep inside himself, so would he truly be upset?
Gu Ze opened the door to the study, and sure enough, he found Meng Fu scribbling on his notebook at the desk.
Meng Fu jumped out of the chair almost in fright when the door opened, then he dropped his gaze as usual.
“Meng Fu, you saw the news, didn’t you?”
“I did.”
“What they wrote in the news…” Was what Zhou Weiguo said true? Are you really the prison bitch who gets passed around by everyone? But if so, why would you have to ask the doctor for tips on making it hurt less?
What was true, and what was false?
“That isn’t me, Mr. Gu. I’ve been in here the whole time. I never left, not once.” He interrupted Gu Ze’s question. After a pause, he added, “Though, it’s strange that something like that would appear on the news. That man in the photo looked a lot like me.”
Gu Ze recalled the boy he had seen at the club and recalled the way he whimpered as Chief Liang kissed him.
“Yes, that’s right. It wasn’t you.”
Meng Fu thought that he was being sarcastic. “You think it’s me, don’t you? I understand.” In Gu Ze’s eyes, wasn’t he nothing more than a slut?
“No. I know that wasn’t you. Meng Fu, does it upset you to see that on the news?”
“…It’s just my retribution.” How could he not be upset? Being trampled on, accused of things he never did, and dragged through the mud… Gu Ze, you must have known about this long ago if you’re bringing this up now. Was it your doing? Were you the one casting me deeper into the nameless abyss, to suffer a life more grueling than burning in hell?
It pricked Gu Ze’s heart to hear Meng Fu call it retribution. He took a step closer toward him.
They were so close that their breaths were intertwined.
Meng Fu could instinctively guess what Gu Ze wanted to do. They were going to kiss, weren’t they? No, he did not want to imagine the feeling of their tongues twisting together, but Gu Ze lowered his head and a cool palm touched his neck.
He shuddered.
Just bear with it, Meng Fu. You can bear with anything, can’t you?
He reassured himself.
“Meng Fu, what sort of face would you make during sex?” he asked in a whisper, images of the boy biting his lip playing in his mind. What about you, Meng Fu?
How would you react?
You always bury your face into the pillow.
“Huh?”
Gu Ze, Mr. Gu… Please, stop asking me these strange questions. What are you trying to prove?
“Of course, how am I supposed to expect you to be able to see your own face?
But Meng Fu, every minute of every day, I seem to be thinking about your face as if I had lost my mind. What would you look like?
“Mr. Gu…”
“Meng Fu, have you slept with any other man before when you were in prison?”
The questions only got worse. “No.”
How many times did he have to answer the same questions? He asked them in the past, and he asked them now, each time hurting more than the last like a scar that would never heal.
Gu Ze’s finger stroked the skin of his neck as if he were admiring a fine piece of porcelain.
Meng Fu backed away, but his feet touched the chair behind him. “Mr. Gu, if you’re going to do it, just do it.” Just like before, without any words exchanged between them, he would lie down after stripping his clothes, then once Gu Ze had vented his desires on him, he would leave with sarcastic insults.
Gu Ze felt a twang of pain in his chest. Meng Fu, oh Meng Fu… That’s the kind of relationship we’re in after all. What other kind of relationship could we be in?
He pressed him onto the bookcase, and his back pressed against the rows of books.
Leaning close, he whispered into Meng Fu’s ear. “Meng Fu, why did it have to be you? Why did you have to be the one who hit Manyu? Why…”
“I’m sorry.”
With a meandering stroke across Meng Fu’s skin, tiny goosebumps could be felt rising up, but he had no idea whether they had appeared due to fear or disgust.
All of a sudden, Gu Ze pressed his lips against his neck, stopping for two seconds before caressing the skin with his tongue.
“Mr. Gu, I need to get back to my room for a moment.” Meng Fu pushed Gu Ze away and hurried out of the study.
Gu Ze leaned against the bookcase, touching his own lips.
He remained by himself for a while before heading out to his room.
That man had already stripped himself of his clothes. When he saw Gu Ze enter, he moved toward the bed slowly but not hesitantly and prostrated himself.
Scooping him up by the waist, Gu Ze turned him around so he could face him instead.
Meng Fu was surprised. “Mr. Gu…”
There was a cold yet pained look in Gu Ze’s eyes as he leaned down to taste his neck again.
“Mr. Gu…” Meng Fu moved his head away to avoid him. “Just do it.”
Gu Ze was taken aback for a moment, and Meng Fu took advantage of that hesitation to try and push him away so that he could turn back around, but he hardly moved an inch before he was picked up and placed back onto the bed.
A large hand roamed around his waist, fingers slithering across his clear, pronounced rib cage like a snake. His movements were so gentle that it almost seemed unreal.
For Meng Fu, however, this felt even harder to bear than what he used to be subjected to. He tried to push his hand away again. “Mr. Gu, just do it, please.”
However, his cool hands just continued roaming across his skin as if they had become smitten, this time trailing to the pink nubs protruding from his chest which exuded an oblivious charm.
“Mr. Gu…” Meng Fu grabbed Gu Ze by the wrist, his eyes glistening with tears. “Don’t do this.”
Unable to hold his desires back, Gu Ze was breathing back as he met his eyes. “Is there something wrong with this?”
“Is this a new kind of torture?”
“…”
“If so, it hurt more in the past, so just do it that way.”
“…”
Seeing that Gu Ze was remaining silent, he took that as a yes. So, he tried going back on his knees again, but his wrist was grabbed by Gu Ze before he could move, and a hand pinned his head down.
Leaning over, Gu Ze’s lips pressed against the little raised cherries on his chest.
“Mr. Gu, don’t… I’m sorry, it was my fault…” He pleaded in a panicked voice.
However, the kiss heated up as time went on. He would tease them with the tip of his tongue and nibble them with his teeth until the red cherries stood up. As if that were not enough, his lips moved up and up as if they were thirsty for more.
“I was wrong, Mr. Gu.”
He tried to struggle. A strange feeling was appearing in his body, and all he wanted to do was escape it, rejecting it out of instinct.
However, Gu Ze turned a deaf ear to his pleading. He continued kissing him as if he wanted nothing more than to take him into himself, yearning to hear his soft moans.
His struggle intensified, but his wrists were caught and locked above his head. He tried to pull his hands back, but they were bound under Gu Ze’s iron grip. Through the bandages, he could even feel his injured wrist throbbing painfully.
He pushed against him and pleaded, “Mr. Gu, please don’t do this…”