Translator: Helliot
Editor: P’Raikantopeni
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“No, I’m not qualified to hate you, Mr. Gu,” he muttered with indifference.
His body swayed back and forth along with Gu Ze’s movements as searing pain tore through his body.
Gu Ze was panting hard, but in his mind, he was thinking, Meng Fu, I rather you hate me than to give me the cold shoulder like this. I even began to hate the never-changing “sorrys” that come from your mouth, hate the endless patience you have toward your guilt…
Even more than that, I hate the rare resistance you showed for Xie Zhenzhen’s sake.
“Meng Meng…” At some point, Meng Yi came downstairs and was shocked to find Meng Fu held down under Gu Ze.
He ran over in a hurry and tried to pull Gu Ze away. “Let go of Meng-Meng, you can’t bully him!”
Gu Ze shoved Meng Yi away and thrust his hips even more vigorously.
Meng Fu, unable to hold his voice back, let out a pained whimper. Seeing Meng Yi who had stumbled to the floor, he felt even more panicked. No matter what, he never wanted Meng Yi to see him in such a shameful state.
He struggled hard to break free, but Gu Ze pressed him down even tighter.
The only thing he could do was grab the clothes littered on the floor to cover where his and Gu Ze’s bodies were connected. He felt embarrassed and panicked. He could even feel the blood rushing up to his face.
Meng Yi climbed off the ground and rushed at Gu Ze again, shouting, “Go away! No bullying Meng-Meng!”
Meng Fu calmed himself down and tried to make himself look as unflustered as possible. He even managed to squeeze out a smile. “Xiao Yi, Mr. Gu isn’t bullying me. You should go back to your room for now.”
“Meng-Meng…”
Meng Yi seemed to understand, but he could guess that something was wrong/something vaguely clicked in him and fell into even deeper confusion.
“No, he’s bullying Meng-Meng!”
Meng Yi hit his fist against Gu Ze’s back.
Meng Fu could visibly see Gu Ze getting pushed over the edge. As his actions grew more violent as if in punishment, he spoke in a panic, “Mn… Xiao Yi, be a good boy and go back to your room, please… Mmph…”
Meng Yi looked dazedly at Meng Fu. “Meng-Meng, Meng-Meng…” He was at a loss. Despite recognizing that Gu Ze was doing something bad to Meng-Meng, Meng-Meng was insistent that he wasn’t.
“Behave, Xiao Yi,” Meng Fu repeated again.
He didn’t wish for Meng Yi to see them doing such a thing, much less see the simple-minded Meng Yi traumatized by such an ordeal.
Finally, Meng Yi left without any more fuss. Before heading up, he stopped in front of the stairs and glanced back, but with the back of the sofa blocking his view, he could only see Gu Ze leaning down.
As he slowly walked up the stairs, curiosity spurred him to look back at what the two of them were doing. The higher up he went, the more he could see of what they were doing. Then…
He clutched onto his shirt. He saw Gu Ze kiss Meng Fu’s chest and brush his tongue over the red nubs, then he saw his face move up, his lips laying a kiss on his face.
He didn’t understand what it meant.
But there was a part of it that seemed to make sense to him.
Meng Yi gritted his teeth. His mind turned blank as he went up the stairs in a gaze. He shut the door behind him, but what he saw downstairs was something that he would not be able to forget for a long time.
Again and again, those memories would resurface as he grew more and more anxious.
Meng Fu had no idea when he fell unconscious, but when he came to, he stared at the ceiling in a daze. His body hurt, and his cheeks which had been slapped by Gu Ze swelled up, but it was no comparison to the pain he felt below.
It must have ripped yesterday.
When he had gotten injured or how serious it was, he was too dazed to know.
At the click of a lighter, he realized surprisingly that someone else was in the room with him. He turned his head belatedly to see a man standing in front of the window—Gu Ze.
A wisp of smoke wafted over.
He turned back to the ceiling again, shutting his eyes and opening them again.
After a long time, when the cigarette burned out, Gu Ze turned around and sat on the bed. Looking at Meng Fu’s clear, blank eyes, he said, “You’re awake.”
“Mm.”
“…Does it still hurt?”
“No.”
“Meng Fu.” He leaned down and pressed his forehead against Meng Fu’s. “You should say it hurts when it hurts. I don’t like it when you lie.”
“It hurts.”
He answered honestly, his eyes cast down the entire time, staring at the blue-checkered blanket.
“Good. I’ll ask you one last time, don’t lie.” Pulling back slightly, Gu Ze’s finger brushed over Meng Fu’s brow, then he tapped a finger on his chest. “Do you still have Xie Zhenzhen in your heart or not?”
Finally, he raised his dark eyes to face Gu Ze. “How do you want me to answer, Mr. Gu? No matter how I answer, you won’t believe me either way.”
“I just want an honest answer from you.”
If you could make up a convincing lie, then I would choose to believe you and leave the matter alone.
“It’s true. It’s impossible for me to forget about Zhenzhen completely.”
She was my first love, the first person to write me a love letter. There is nothing left between us, I don’t love her anymore, but she still occupies a space in my heart.
I’m telling you the truth as it is, Mr. Gu.
Gu Ze suddenly slammed his fist down on the bed. Meng Fu… how am I supposed to let go when you won’t even lie to me?
“Mr. Gu, the baby in Zhenzhen’s belly doesn’t belong to me. There’s no reason to hurt the child, we’ve already broken up so there’s no way there can be anything between us. This is my sin, so I alone should atone for it.”
“Meng Fu!”
“What is it that you want exactly, Mr. Gu? What more should I do?” he asked.
He couldn’t understand. Gu Ze wanted to see him in pain, but wasn’t he in pain now? Did he really want to hurt the baby in Xie Zhenzhen’s belly even though it was not his?
“I…”
He couldn’t speak.
What he wanted to say got stuck in his throat. Meng Fu, I want you to like me.
Deep emotions swirled in his dark eyes.
Meng Fu looked at him without a ripple in his eyes, awaiting his answer.
But what he received instead was a kiss on his lips. It was light, and he could almost feel a bit of warmth behind it, but that must have been just an illusion, he thought.
Then, Gu Ze backed away in a hurry. “Take care of yourself.”
With that said, Gu Ze left, shutting the door heavily behind him.
Silence returned to the room. Only the throbbing pain assaulting Meng Fu’s senses reminded him that he was living in hell. Laughing at himself, he thought, Meng Fu, you’ve been living in hell all along, haven’t you?
–
Shui Qing was all dressed up. When she walked over to Gu Ze with her handbag slung over her shoulder, she looked excited. After getting in the car, she asked, “Where are we going?”
She was a famous celebrity so no scandals were allowed. During her short spell with Gu Ze, she had been nothing more than a bed warmer to him.
A date was a rare thing for her, and it was something she was looking forward to.
“Where do you want to go?” Gu Ze asked.
Day after day passed by quickly.
“Let’s go and watch a movie,” Shui Qing suggested.
“I don’t want to get my picture taken by the paparazzi and join you in the headlines tomorrow.” The rumor that broke out between him and Shui Qing in the past was infuriating enough.
Shui Qing looked disappointed, but she squeezed out a smile. “Gu Ze, you have no idea, do you? Yuyang has shut down and it’s been a long time since I’ve last acted. I’m old news.”
Yuyang Film and Television was shut down after its owner, Zhao Yang, was suppressed by Qin Mo. Shui Qing, who never had the acting skills to begin with, saw her fame plummeting instantaneously, but Gu Ze never paid any attention to any of it.