First Published on Chaleuria
15.2 – Losing Control
“Yao Yuan.” Exhausted, Su Mu softly sighed. “I won’t be tied down by anything, not even you.”
Yao Yuan, who was drunk, had no way of knowing what Su Mu was thinking. All he knew was that Su Mu had admitted to deceiving him, and he continued throwing disorderly punches at Su Mu.
“Yao Yuan.” Su Mu, still held down by Yao Yuan, used every technique he knew to meet Yao Yuan’s onslaught, and before long they were both exhausted.
Although Yao Yuan had the advantage being on top, his drunken actions drained his strength quickly. His breathing was labored. The gaze he looked at Su Mu with was distant, containing a sadness even he had not noticed.
It was this look that crashed hard into Su Mu’s spirit. He had never seen Yao Yuan look so pitiful, and it left him momentarily shocked, momentarily moved, and momentarily lost. He looked at Yao Yuan’s lips, close at hand, reddened from the wine and glistening invitingly, and Su Mu, who had lost himself, drew closer as if enchanted. He lightly touched Yao Yuan’s nose, and then slowly placed his lips over Yao Yuan’s.
The gentle touch shocked Su Mu deep in his soul, a feeling that could overturn mountains and oceans. He could no longer be satisfied with just this, and deepened the kiss.
Perhaps because of his intoxication, Yao Yuan was especially sensitive and he trembled involuntarily. Reflexively he opened his mouth and returned the kiss, passionate but unpracticed.
Su Mu’s back went ramrod straight. All his rationality went on strike. He turned and held Yao Yuan down beneath him, entering his mouth to continue the forceful dance. An unnameable, overwhelming tingling rushed forth from all points of his body. For a moment, Su Mu felt as if he was falling into a silent and dark world. Aside from Yao Yuan, he could feel nothing else. This was a completely new experience. Just one kiss left him thoroughly lost.
His nose was filled with the sweet scent of wine, and in his mouth he felt Yao Yuan’s somewhat clumsy response. Su Mu couldn’t hold himself back and caressed Yao Yuan’s body, the sensation at his fingertips making his whole body tremble. Senseless, he kissed Yao Yuan’s neck, then his sensual collarbones, and his desire grew stronger and stronger. He wanted him.
“Su Mu…” Yao Yuan, still in a state of confusion, could only call his name. His voice, usually bright, was now slightly hoarse. He lifted both arms to wrap around Su Mu, giving everything Su Mu was passionately taking.
All rationality long gone, Su Mu moved his hands over Yao Yuan’s body until they landed on a raised object, the heat he could feel through the clothes finally bringing his reason back.
He swiftly let go of Yao Yuan, then immediately backed off in disbelief. Remembering his passion from earlier, Su Mu was stunned. He suddenly realized how strong his desire for Yao Yuan had grown. How could this be possible? Who had always emphasized there would never be unknowns in his life? If he went on like this, this person would destroy his life.
He looked at Yao Yuan who was still on the ground, his condition unclear, and Su Mu’s gaze turned in an instant from passionate to cold. “Yao Yuan, leave. I don’t want anything more to do with you.”
Then came a knock on the door. The attendant’s voice through the door was somewhat muffled: “Mr. Su, the hangover soup you wanted.”
He stood up, walked to the door, and pulled it open. He covered up his chilly expression, replacing it with the trademark smile of the Su family’s second young master.
The attendant looked at him with surprise.
Su Mu knew what he looked like right now; his clothes were in disarray and his hair was messy. He smiled and explained, “When this guy gets drunk he likes to pick fights.”
Everything clicked into place for the attendant, who flushed slightly at her earlier thoughts. “Do you need my help?”
“No, he’s fine now.”
Su Mu turned and returned to the room where Yao Yuan was nodding off on the floor. Su Mu brought the cup to his lips and fed him the hangover soup. This time, Yao Yuan cooperated and obediently swallowed the tonic.
Su Mu bent close to his ear and said lightly, “Yao Yuan, I never want to see you again.”